thou shalt not conform when thou could blaze thy own path..

Treasures of 2006

"All children grow up. That is their tragedy. Except Peter Pan. That's his." - J.M. Barrie, author of Peter Pan

I've learnt that :

.. I need to slow down to catch somebody in their moments..
.. I need to slow down and accompany somebody at the bus stop when the bus havent come yet..
.. I need to be more patient with the ppl surrounding me and not give them a hard time, even if they deserve it..
.. I need to be more patient in my pursuit for self-gratification and worthy cause..

I've understood that :

.. life will throw a few wet puppies towards my direct in hope of me learning how to take care of them..
.. some ppl dun wanna change cos it's not yet their time or that life has been kind enuf to them not to ask them to grow up..
.. life is a plentiful of series of unexpected events that if I play my cards right, they'll jot down into my treasure box..

Year 2006..

.. the year where the storks have been kind to the stars..
.. the year where I stumped in my growth..
.. the year where I feel like I've dissappointed myself..

Year 2007..

.. hopefully the year where life will be kind to me..
.. hopefully I'll be kind to myself..
.. hopefully I'll be kind to other people.

Amen.

Labels: Poignance, Resolution, Self-Dissect

posted by M.E. # 5:36 PM 0 Comments

Christmas 2006

Christmas 2006 aint too bad by my definition.

I had expected worse, but thank gudness for friends.

Had mine at Bulldog, Sri Hartamas, aint exactly the best place to be cos it seemed pretty quiet even when it hit 11.30pm and christmas is just 30 minutes later.

Saw Rashid Salled there, the msian Joey-feelalike who mentioned to my friend (they've been exchanging contacts) that the place's practically his second home. *hint-hint..haha..

That friend of mine is weird really, she's always looking dazed out when she's hanging around with us, either she's bored or she thinks too much..but her look works for attracting the least expected ppl, so before the nite is over, she had had round of drinks offered by strangers. Charming.

Anyway, went back around 2.30am, my friends were still hitting the place but my eyes need some shutting down. Besides, I dun wanna drink-and-sleep in my car.

So I went back and washed off the smoke from my hair and pulled my legs to bed.

Next morn, I woke up with smell of smoke on my pillow, how disgusting can one get. I thought I had them all rid off the nite previously..well..that's the end of my late-nite-drinking escapadees for year 2006.

Never again..for 2006.

The next day I called friends that I wun be joining for christmas day luncheon, cos I had allergic symptoms due to last nite.

So basically I woke up early, bathed, heated last nite's meal for morning breakfast while viewing the latest brought dvd, a combo of 7 movies in one disc; X-Men I, X-Men II, X-Men III, Hellboy, Hulk, Daredevil and I-cant-remember-the-last. I can never be happier. Now I'm looking for Harry Potter dvd combo series.

Then I cleaned up my room and shifted things all around so I'd hav space to put the carpet on the floor and enuf place to stretch like a cat. *purr..My room now officially looks feminine, girly like, neat, clean..well, till the next dust tornado hits or till my next spring cleaning.

In fact, I cleaned the place up so well that that nite when there are ppl looking at the room ( I will probably move in to new place end of Jan, sad actually ),they asked when I can move out. *sheesh..

I've put all the mattresses on the single bed, thus making me feel like I'm the Princess and the Pea. Very back-ache-breaking..

Called up my sis and mentioned to em my acts for the day, and heard B had brought a whole bedroom set for only rm688, darn, in KL one can get bedroom set at cheapest rm999, how can????

Now since I can only move into new place at the end of Jan, I cant get that q-size mattress plus divan (head piece) at year-end sale..*darn.

Enough with self-pity already..

These four days of holiday, I had a lovely CSI-feast. My xmas gift for myself; CSI (Season 1,2,3). Marvelous..I cant get enough of CSI, basically, I had a whole seasonal collection of em now, except Season 4 and 5 is now back in Sarawak.

So I have been havin dreams of decapitated corpses and larvea infested body parts, I'd say, my brain is very paranoid right now. Thus, I will be very homely from now on till I got MIB the cartoon series to bring my charming nature back out into the world. (Imagine, me, charming..hoho)

So next challenge before moving out of the current residence; get more boxes and get more organised. And pick up that painting brush..

PS : Just now as I was on the phone with my sis, my coll walked by and gave me a wink, I hav a nasty feeling that he thought I was chatting with my underground bf. Guess my wish for the new year (colls winking at u) has just been pre-maturely fulfilled..ironically..*sigh..

Labels: Christmas

posted by M.E. # 10:26 AM 0 Comments

BB Back, Yahoo!

My sis went back to sarawak yesterday, flight 11.40am, airasia at LCCT.

I fetched her there, waited in line with her, sent her off at 11.10am and took a lone drive back to office.

As I watched her walking into the glass door, it looked like the senario one got when one's sending off their relatives or smtg and there's a clot smwhere at ur throat.

I've been sent off by my parents and relatives and friends, but I've never been in the position to send off another person, u know?

Anyway, after years living with her and squabbling over petty matters and other misfits, I've come to realise I actually counted a lot on her and depended a lot on her as well.

Now that she wun be around to safe my butt any more, I just gt revert back to being self-dependent. Meaning, clean after my own mess, wash my own clothes, cook my own food, clear up unneccessary stuff that I dun use.

I've realised too, as I cleaned up the room yesternite, that when I'm living with her, we've got lotsa stuff we dun use but we put it there perhaps for show. It's like a whole wardrobe or collection of toiletries tat when ppl come into the room, they'd expect a whole family living there whereas there's only two.

I mean, how messy can one get?

Anyway, we aint messy, just hoarding a lot of stuff and never seem to throw em away even though we've kept them for some up to five years.

Many freebies toiletries that we dun use, but kept it for just in case..lotsa half used cosmetics still kept for JIC (just in case) moments.

It's nuts.

So, as I was saying, when I live alone, I always put stuff that I use frequently and boxed up those tat I dun touch or give to other ppl when needs arise.

So basically one can see a lot of space and not many stuff, cos I'm one person show maa.

And lotsa dust too, cos I dun do spring cleaning that often or only when whim strikes.

When living with another person, the space never seem to be enough.

When I'm finally getting the whole place to myself, the space seems a bit intimidating.

It's really odd actually.

At the airport, she asked me if I'd miss her or not.

Actually, the thing I'd miss most bout my sis is her cooking and presence, the thing I wouldnt miss most would be her tantrum.

She laughed and said smtimes when she's with me, most of the time I wouldnt talk and do my own stuff, that I just need to know that she's there is enuf.

I guess she's right, I'm not that talkative on a daily basis, I let my mind do the talking for me, which if most ppl would just sit down and observe and be really quiet, they'd hear how the conversations going on in the air.

Nope, I'm not suffering from some mental illness, just most of the time, my mind moves too fast for my mouth, and by the time I wanna voice out my thoughts, the moment's passed and another thought resides in the current memory. Even as a kid I've been like that, non-talkative, self-minding-business and unpredictable.

I hate it when ppl say that I think too much, they never seem to question my actions when problems arise and I solve it effortlessly and without a word, most of em just thought I handle meself pretty well, well, that's cos my mind has predicted all those senarios before it even happened that some happen as deja vu. It's called visualizations and affirmations in case anybody's thinking wat a wack job I am.

Anyway, being alone for some times does that to u. That's y first 2-3 yrs of a kid's life is of absolute crucial, if one wanna hav kids, hav 2 kids at least, a yr apart so they'd hav partners-in-crime and wingmen. After 2 kids, the rest one can hav after a few years, but gt make it pairs if parents dun really hav time for kids, so the kids wuld hav playmates and smthing to occupy their time. Otherwise, they'd turn out like some of my friends who r the only child in the family, thus making em brats in some ways and always gotta hang around w friends or whoever cos they r so bored to death.

My sis Diana is also suffering from such predicament. She's the only baby left at home now, but mum's in Kuching and dad's in hometown and both of em dun seem to really talk to her. So far the person she's closest to is in Singapore who ironically never seem to stop bickering with her when they were together last time at hometown. Now that Nat's in spore, D kinda missed her companionship and they have been having some heated sms transactions going on, which aint exactly a bad thing except that Nat complains too much and sends off too many negative vibes to D.

Now that B and Nat's back in Kuching, cool. 5/6 family reunion.

So now what I gotta do is start hoarding CSI Las Vegas (season 1,2,3), NCIS (season1,2), Futurama (season1), MIB Cartoon Series.

"Lonely, I'm so lonely.." - xmas 2006

Labels: Happenings

posted by M.E. # 11:45 AM 0 Comments

Sex and the City

Can women have sex like men?
- Yes
Exactly, how powerful is beautiful?
- Depending on the pressure
Is there a secret cold war between marrieds and singles?
- Maybe
Are men in their 20’s the new designer drug?
- Only for the new independence women
Where’s the line between professional girlfriend and just plain professional?
- Too thin to judge
How many of us are having sex with people we are ashamed to introduce to our friends?
- Too many to admit
In a city like New York, with infinite possibilities, has monogamy become too much to expect?
- In city like KL, it's already too much to expect monogamy
Are threesomes the new sexual frontier?
- Only for the grossly confused
In a city of great expectations, is it time to settle for what you can get? (aka: Is it always better to marry someone who loves you more than you love them?)
- Yes
Is motherhood a cult?
- Yes, an infectious one as well
How often is normal?
- As often as possible and as often as age permits with one partner, more than one partner it's borderlining on pervertism
Are relationships the religion of the 90’s?
- Nope, careers are
What are the break-up rules?
- Some says avoid and conquer, others say hook up asap, there's none actually
Are there certain things in a relationship that one should never say?
- Yes, like can I keep that undies after u r done?
Are all men freaks?
- Yes
Is it better to fake it than be alone?
- Depends
Can a relationship bring you back to life?
- Depends
Is cheating like the proverbial tree in the forest – it doesn’t exist if there’s no one around to catch you?
- Yes, and the person u r cheating with is dead or dumb or married or crippled or..they always come back and bite u in the arse
Is it still possible to believe in love at first sight?
- Yes
Are we willing to believe anything to date? (aka: Do modern-day singles need modern-day myths just so they can date?)
- Yes
Can you change a man?
- Nope
Can we date outside our caste? (aka: Has New York’s class system been replaced by a caste system?)
- Depends
Are New Yorkers evolving past relationships?
- New Yorkers are evolving towards fashion in replacement of chocolate
When it comes to relationships, how do you know when enough is enough?
- When u start losing hair and notice it and utter the words aloud
Do you have to play games to make a relationship work?
- Depends
Are we all, in fact, just dating the same person over and over again? (aka: Are we doomed to date the same type of person again and again?)
- Yes, but we can change
When you sleep with someone, are you screwing the family?
- Nope, cos they've never met u
How do you know if you’re good in bed?
- What the ego says, goes
Twenty-something girls: friend… or foe?
- Depends
Can you be friends with an ex?
- Depends
Do women just want to be rescued?
- Mostly do, ironically
Can there be sex without politics?
- Not much, they can both be downright dirty
Are there women in New York who are just there to make us feel bad about ourselves?
- Yes, they are everywhere
If we can take the best of the other sex and make it our own, has the opposite sex become obsolete? (aka: Is sexual flipping the wave of the future?)
- Not really, nature doesnt design us that way
In relationships, what are the “deal breakers”?
- Whoever with the dough or biggest ego
Are we simply romantically challenged or are we sluts? (aka: Do modern women need to be reminded that romance isn’t dead?)
- Sluts
Do we need drama to make a relationship work?
- Depends
Is timing everything?
- Yes
When it comes to relationships, is it smarter to follow your heart or your head?
- Heart cum instinct
Can we have it all?
- Nope
When you crawl in bed with someone, is sex ever safe?
- Nope
In a relationship, is honesty really the best policy?
- Depends
Can you really ever escape your past?
- Not really, they always come back to bite u in the arse, so be careful
Is it really what’s on the outside that counts?
- For others, first impression, for oneself, inner peace and acceptance counts
Are we 34 going on 13?
- Yes
Are we getting wiser or just older?
- Yes for former, we are 34 going on 13 for latter
Is there such a thing as relationship karma?
- Yes
Is it us? (aka: Can it be that the problem isn’t them … it’s us?)
- Depends
Soul Mate – reality or torture device?
- Torture device
No matter how hard we look: do we ever see ourselves clearly?
- Nope, cos we are all born liars
What really defines a relationship?
- Dunno
What comes first, the chicken or the sex?
- Pork
When a relationship dies, do we ever really give up the ghost?
- Nope
In matter of love, do actions really speak louder than words?
- Yes, but only after the words are spoken, else it'll be taken for granted and disregard
Can you ever really forgive if you can’t forget?
- Nope
Why are we so many independent women?
- Cos men are just born lazy or feminized
In a relationship, when does the art of compromise become compromising?
- When one feels used
Are men just women with balls?
- Yes, with balls strategically placed to mislead women
Are we there yet?
- Not really
In matter of love, how do you know when it’s right?
- One never knows for sure, one just sticks with one's principle till convinced otherwise
What are we fighting for?
- Better future
To be in a couple, do you have to put your single self on a shelf?
- Yes
Do we really want these things, or are we just programmed?
- Programmed and influenced and brain washed
What’s it all worth?
- Nothing, only self gratification
How much does a father figure figure?
- Nowadays, not much, we still live within our own fantasies that we'd find a guy who would be the best for our kids but reality denotes otherwise. The perfect father figure never existed.
Can you make a mistake and miss your fate?
- Yes
When it comes to being carefree single girls, have we missed the boat?
- Depends on how u live ur life
What is the harm of believing?
- Very harmful
Should you judge a book by its cover?
- Not really thought it's easiest
Why does one, minus a plus one, always feel like it adds up to zero?
- Cos we are programmed to think that way
When it comes to life and love… why do we always believe our worst reviews?
- Cos we've seen too much or heard too much to believe that good things can actually happen to us
Are we the new bachelors?
- Yes, for years and years to come..
Is a relationship a relationship without a zsa-zsa-zou (aka : that special something that gives you butterflies in the stomach)?
- Depends
When it comes to finance and dating – why do we keep investing?
- Cos we like to live life dangerously
Why is it always something?
- Excuses excuses..
Can you get to a future if your past is present?
- Nope
Are there times when the lady should just shut the fuck up?
- Yes, applies for the gentleman too..
Are the men of today less threatened by a woman’s power or are they just acting?
- Acting, they really should cower in fear
Do we need distance to get close?
- Yes
Do we search for lessons to lessen the pain?
- Yes
When did it stop being fun and start being scary?
- When we feel used and things didnt turn out the way we want it to be
When did we stop to be free, to be you and me?
- When we learn to compromise
When it comes to matter of the heart … do we need to go back to high-school?
- Not really
Just how dangerous is an open heart?
- Very dangerous

Labels: Myself, Opinions

posted by M.E. # 11:17 AM 0 Comments

thou shalt not conform when thou could blaze thy own path..

Treasures of 2006

Christmas 2006

BB Back, Yahoo!

Sex and the City

Archives