thou shalt not conform when thou could blaze thy own path..
Provoking Individualism
Ever been provoked to do something nice but naughty? Out of random or self-preservation?
Something that makes one feel tantalizingly gooey on the inside? Puts a smile on one or whistling as one walka with that extra spring in one's steps?
Well, it's been quite some time since I was provoked to take a stand on anything.
I guess, society nowadays is pretty mild as everyone tried to blend in and making beige out of everything.
Just the other day I was discussing a topic on one nation, but the paper said there's no such thing as one nation in this country as we are made of many different colorful things and people.
If we'd hav blended in, then we'd be like sporeans.
Anyway, digressing..I was just thinking, wouldnt it be great if one walks down the street and there's this person performing; splashing paint on a white human mannequin, trying to make color coming alive thru spontaneousity, not worrying bout who's doing the cleaning up or if one's gonna be fined over the display of life celebration?
Or when one walks down the lane, seeing a few ppl doing somersault and showing some sparks for life.
We keep on seeing all these zest on commercials, but in real life, it all existed only in our head.
Is it so wrong to embrace diversity and difference in our daily lives? Being eccentric and not caring while at the same time..remain refreshingly original?
I can imagine how the ppl would feel when they tore down the wall of berlin, or when one swam w the whales to promote world peace or ecology rights, or make a fashion statement out out of the spur of the moment or when one was handed their first car key.
Free to be anything, free to dream and free to dip one's feet in the cool water..
Here's to freedom.
posted by M.E. # 3:12 PM 4 Comments
Taken for Granted
Last weekend I went for a wedding.
But I ended up feeling unhappy.
Cos somebody spoilt my mood.
I will not go out w tat person anymore cos one thing I really hate, is being taken for granted by somebody I liked.
I know I said this many times to myself, and everytime found myself soften.
I hav so many things to say, but my feeling is overwhelmed right now.
I will not justify how I feel nor how he made me feel right now cos I should've scolded him on the spot but I didnt. I never can handle my anger properly as they always come as an after effect after a few hrs or a day.
I'm so pissed and so unhappy w myself to put myself in that condition.
I will stop typing now and let my anger overflow.
But I ended up feeling unhappy.
Cos somebody spoilt my mood.
I will not go out w tat person anymore cos one thing I really hate, is being taken for granted by somebody I liked.
I know I said this many times to myself, and everytime found myself soften.
I hav so many things to say, but my feeling is overwhelmed right now.
I will not justify how I feel nor how he made me feel right now cos I should've scolded him on the spot but I didnt. I never can handle my anger properly as they always come as an after effect after a few hrs or a day.
I'm so pissed and so unhappy w myself to put myself in that condition.
I will stop typing now and let my anger overflow.
Labels: Angst
posted by M.E. # 8:44 AM 0 Comments
Nagging Worries
I'm constantly worrying over small little things. It's ingrained in me; I'm female, u see.
My sis was always telling me her insecurity issues like eating habits n stuf. For me, she's healthy physically, only her self-esteem is retarded.
When I was her age, I got this thing u call "Dear Diary". Her english sux, so I guess it's her excuse to complain, it's becoming a broken record nowadays cos I've heard the same issues for like 5 times everytime we tok, but who am I to complain, my life is none-existance for all they care. I'm just a friendly-ear of the neighbourhood. *sigh..
I understand that she's merely depress.
I mean, who wouldnt if they dun like to befriend ppl their own age and only toks to ppl who she deems is interesting enuf.
*sigh..
I'm so afraid of asking her again to make more friends..her mind is so small it scares me sh*tless. She mentioned she only met ppl from her school (who's her age or 17-yr-old-thus-still-babies-not-deserving-of-her-company-yet) and the church mates (who are crazy in her opinion and from wat I heard, pretty crazy in my opinions too. I mean, how can one says that when a baby is born, they are already defined into good and evil?!? stoopid la..).
First of all, age doesnt mean a person is not mature. A person mayb 30+ and still immature. I met many ppl in my programs who are younger than me but acted more mature than I am (course sometimes they are bizarrely weird but tat's ok, cos I tok weird too..)
Second of all, she's lazy. If one's first impression doesnt hit with her, she's stop making effort.
Thirdly, she needs prozac..just joking. She's merely going thru a lot of insecurity phase now, I went thru it in my form 6 period..which is around her age. Sadly I have no one to speak to..thus I read a lot then. I still do. Like wat I said..she's lazy.
Thus, I ask her to go find work if she cant bear the circle of ppl she's meeting now.
Hopefully she'd be able to find friends who suits her enigmatic taste.
Advice to sis : Please dun find friends in the clubs cos they've amnesia problem, u might be a figment of their imagination by the morrow.
posted by M.E. # 6:10 PM 0 Comments
My sis was always telling me her insecurity issues like eating habits n stuf. For me, she's healthy physically, only her self-esteem is retarded.
When I was her age, I got this thing u call "Dear Diary". Her english sux, so I guess it's her excuse to complain, it's becoming a broken record nowadays cos I've heard the same issues for like 5 times everytime we tok, but who am I to complain, my life is none-existance for all they care. I'm just a friendly-ear of the neighbourhood. *sigh..
I understand that she's merely depress.
I mean, who wouldnt if they dun like to befriend ppl their own age and only toks to ppl who she deems is interesting enuf.
*sigh..
I'm so afraid of asking her again to make more friends..her mind is so small it scares me sh*tless. She mentioned she only met ppl from her school (who's her age or 17-yr-old-thus-still-babies-not-deserving-of-her-company-yet) and the church mates (who are crazy in her opinion and from wat I heard, pretty crazy in my opinions too. I mean, how can one says that when a baby is born, they are already defined into good and evil?!? stoopid la..).
First of all, age doesnt mean a person is not mature. A person mayb 30+ and still immature. I met many ppl in my programs who are younger than me but acted more mature than I am (course sometimes they are bizarrely weird but tat's ok, cos I tok weird too..)
Second of all, she's lazy. If one's first impression doesnt hit with her, she's stop making effort.
Thirdly, she needs prozac..just joking. She's merely going thru a lot of insecurity phase now, I went thru it in my form 6 period..which is around her age. Sadly I have no one to speak to..thus I read a lot then. I still do. Like wat I said..she's lazy.
Thus, I ask her to go find work if she cant bear the circle of ppl she's meeting now.
Hopefully she'd be able to find friends who suits her enigmatic taste.
Advice to sis : Please dun find friends in the clubs cos they've amnesia problem, u might be a figment of their imagination by the morrow.
posted by M.E. # 6:10 PM 0 Comments
Me...Myself
A thai story tat evolves around the question on love between the opp gender even when a party's made a choice of his gender preference. Amnesia made him chose another path and questioning his choices.
He went back to his past, but now that he's been touched by new faces, would he turn away from that different choice?
I've watched tat guy did the Shutter and he was mediocre in it. Somebody told me there's a farney naked scene in his new one, thus I couldnt help my pitter patter feet towards the dvd shop.
Makes me wonder, if I'm straight and I turn sideway, would I turn away from that different choice?
What if I fell for a bi? Then I'd hav to compete with their choice of different taste. How does one compete with that?
Makes me wanna pull a quick harakiri on that one. *dazed..
I guess, mayb there's no competition cos if a person loves another, they dun really consider much bout putting the other person hanging. Or would they?
Spoiler to "Me...Myself"
He went back to his past, but now that he's been touched by new faces, would he turn away from that different choice?
I've watched tat guy did the Shutter and he was mediocre in it. Somebody told me there's a farney naked scene in his new one, thus I couldnt help my pitter patter feet towards the dvd shop.
Makes me wonder, if I'm straight and I turn sideway, would I turn away from that different choice?
What if I fell for a bi? Then I'd hav to compete with their choice of different taste. How does one compete with that?
Makes me wanna pull a quick harakiri on that one. *dazed..
I guess, mayb there's no competition cos if a person loves another, they dun really consider much bout putting the other person hanging. Or would they?
Spoiler to "Me...Myself"
Labels: Movie
posted by M.E. # 9:29 AM 0 Comments
Softest Caress
And touches her shoulder..
And places Whispers in her ears..
Reaching the flowers in her hair..
Kissing only tips of the petals..
Leaving behind memoirs of longings..
The wind leaves behind a glance..
Cool against the breezy air..
Wishing she could hear it conversing.
Labels: Lyrical
posted by M.E. # 2:27 PM 1 Comments
Forging Chains
Chatted with a friend. She was worried bout her relationship w the bf.
Cos she had an genetic blood defect and so does the bf, thus if they hav kids of their own one day, the kid's most probably need blood transfusion for the rest of his/her life.
Sad really.
But it's still goes down to the matter of choice.
I mean, Angelina and Brad adopted even when they can afford kids of their own.
Why not u and I?
I mean, adoption, bringing in strangers' kids and making them our own; give em our name, shelter, love, care, food, teachings, life experiences and hoping they'd turn out better than us.
Wat's the big deal with adoption?
Let me tell u what's the big deal.
For the chinese society (me chinese, me live with chinese my whole life) they care a lot when they've to care for kids not of their blood and flesh cos they fear one day when they needed help, the kids would rather look for their own biological parents n leave their adopted parents.
Yes, I guess not only chinese society has such thinking, regardless of race, age or backgrounds, ppl fear for the unknown.
They fear of being left alone when they got older, they fear of nobody to care for em, they fear for themselves.
Let me tell u one thing; own flesh and blood doesnt ensure full security or even half of that security as we grow older.
There's no such thing as sure and confirm that one's own flesh n blood would take care of their parents, only the percentage is higher.
It all goes down to teaching.
A student may take care of his/her teacher or sensei when they grow older.
A stranger may take care of a lonely elderly just cos he/she felt a connection.
A kid may take care of a stray dog or cat from the alley.
And all of em, no blood nor flesh relationships are forged prior to the meeting.
What makes a kid willing to care for us when we get older?
The kid's belief, teachings, experience, knowledge and principles.
Therefore, regardless of own blood or not, any kid is precious cos they really are the next generation; either to care for us the veterans, or the world that we live in now, before they can pass on to the next.
"Teach a kid respect for the living, and they'll in turn, teach you something back." - ngy
PS : If u'd watched "Meet the Robinson", u'd know what I mean. I hope.
posted by M.E. # 6:09 PM 0 Comments
Cos she had an genetic blood defect and so does the bf, thus if they hav kids of their own one day, the kid's most probably need blood transfusion for the rest of his/her life.
Sad really.
But it's still goes down to the matter of choice.
I mean, Angelina and Brad adopted even when they can afford kids of their own.
Why not u and I?
I mean, adoption, bringing in strangers' kids and making them our own; give em our name, shelter, love, care, food, teachings, life experiences and hoping they'd turn out better than us.
Wat's the big deal with adoption?
Let me tell u what's the big deal.
For the chinese society (me chinese, me live with chinese my whole life) they care a lot when they've to care for kids not of their blood and flesh cos they fear one day when they needed help, the kids would rather look for their own biological parents n leave their adopted parents.
Yes, I guess not only chinese society has such thinking, regardless of race, age or backgrounds, ppl fear for the unknown.
They fear of being left alone when they got older, they fear of nobody to care for em, they fear for themselves.
Let me tell u one thing; own flesh and blood doesnt ensure full security or even half of that security as we grow older.
There's no such thing as sure and confirm that one's own flesh n blood would take care of their parents, only the percentage is higher.
It all goes down to teaching.
A student may take care of his/her teacher or sensei when they grow older.
A stranger may take care of a lonely elderly just cos he/she felt a connection.
A kid may take care of a stray dog or cat from the alley.
And all of em, no blood nor flesh relationships are forged prior to the meeting.
What makes a kid willing to care for us when we get older?
The kid's belief, teachings, experience, knowledge and principles.
Therefore, regardless of own blood or not, any kid is precious cos they really are the next generation; either to care for us the veterans, or the world that we live in now, before they can pass on to the next.
PS : If u'd watched "Meet the Robinson", u'd know what I mean. I hope.
posted by M.E. # 6:09 PM 0 Comments
When The Fat Lady Sings
Bought "200 Pounds Beauty", some korean chick flick bout a gal who could sing and turned from fat to phat.
I just love any movies that got nice songs or nicely commercialised songs. I'm dim when it comes to pop songs or any melody that captures my fancy.
Here's some to waste the time :
Star
Maria
Movie Title Teaser
Some song by Loveholic
Hav a feel good phat day.
"I am fabulous." - ngy, vanity-basket
I just love any movies that got nice songs or nicely commercialised songs. I'm dim when it comes to pop songs or any melody that captures my fancy.
Here's some to waste the time :
Star
Maria
Movie Title Teaser
Some song by Loveholic
Hav a feel good phat day.
Labels: Movie
posted by M.E. # 12:30 PM 2 Comments
Fixing Tyre
Just went to hav my car fixed today.
I tried fixing the tyre myself, got the spare tyre out and jack the car but I couldnt get the nut undone. Talk bout incompetent and failure and stoopidity and *&&^%$#@$#@..
Note to self : Unscrew nuts first before jacking.
Anyway, went for professional help and changed 2 back tyres and some other car accessories that I know not of but I'm sure that I'm not being cheated. I think.
Anyway, just discovered that the place where I used to get my car serviced actually tried to con me (I said tried cos I've asked them several times of the tyre pricing but somehow I'm still reluctant of letting em fix my car this time..wait..since I was serviced by em, means..I WAS CONNED!!! Bloody b*st*rds #$%$@$@$^%^&%&^%$%$#$@$#@).
Let's call that shop, The-Shop-That-Used-To-Con-Me while another shop, The-Good-Shop.
I asked The-Shop-That-Used-To-Con-Me bout pricing of some of the parts that I wanna change:
1. Tyre (kenari, 14 inch diameter) = RM 145 / unit
2. Aircond Belt + other misc stuff = RM100+ (services included)
3. Coolent (Naza) = RM25 / 28
Unsatisfied by the amount they charge, I went to The-Good-Shop and asked bout pricing of some of the parts that I wanna change:
1. Tyre (kenari, 14 inch diameter) = RM 120 / unit
2. Aircond Belt + other misc stuff = RM28 (services included)
3. Coolent (Naza) = RM13
So it's no wonder I went to the latter shop for servicing la.
I hate it when they see a female driver and thinks she's ez to con.
That's why, Gal! Do equip urself with knowledge or ask around before u got ur car serviced as there are always really nice shops out there which's not trying to question ur intelligence nor trying to swindle more money outta u.
Also keep track of the receipts and their contact numbers so in case in the future u can do price comparison before u get anything done, that's what one calls "Smart Consumerism".
"Con me once, shame on u. Con me twice, shame on me. Con me again, I'll sue u.." - Ngy
posted by M.E. # 12:18 PM 4 Comments
I tried fixing the tyre myself, got the spare tyre out and jack the car but I couldnt get the nut undone. Talk bout incompetent and failure and stoopidity and *&&^%$#@$#@..
Note to self : Unscrew nuts first before jacking.
Anyway, went for professional help and changed 2 back tyres and some other car accessories that I know not of but I'm sure that I'm not being cheated. I think.
Anyway, just discovered that the place where I used to get my car serviced actually tried to con me (I said tried cos I've asked them several times of the tyre pricing but somehow I'm still reluctant of letting em fix my car this time..wait..since I was serviced by em, means..I WAS CONNED!!! Bloody b*st*rds #$%$@$@$^%^&%&^%$%$#$@$#@).
Let's call that shop, The-Shop-That-Used-To-Con-Me while another shop, The-Good-Shop.
I asked The-Shop-That-Used-To-Con-Me bout pricing of some of the parts that I wanna change:
1. Tyre (kenari, 14 inch diameter) = RM 145 / unit
2. Aircond Belt + other misc stuff = RM100+ (services included)
3. Coolent (Naza) = RM25 / 28
Unsatisfied by the amount they charge, I went to The-Good-Shop and asked bout pricing of some of the parts that I wanna change:
1. Tyre (kenari, 14 inch diameter) = RM 120 / unit
2. Aircond Belt + other misc stuff = RM28 (services included)
3. Coolent (Naza) = RM13
So it's no wonder I went to the latter shop for servicing la.
I hate it when they see a female driver and thinks she's ez to con.
That's why, Gal! Do equip urself with knowledge or ask around before u got ur car serviced as there are always really nice shops out there which's not trying to question ur intelligence nor trying to swindle more money outta u.
Also keep track of the receipts and their contact numbers so in case in the future u can do price comparison before u get anything done, that's what one calls "Smart Consumerism".
posted by M.E. # 12:18 PM 4 Comments
Pushing It
I remembered a time ago when I joined some teens program, as a caretaker thing. The teen program was to instigate a sense of awareness of the current issues that teens are facing today; drug, pregnancy, juvenile crimes..u know, stuff that adults can get away with.
Anyway, it was a period of peace where I was being a third party; merely being an invisible pusher where it needs pushing and do nothing more than being a guide or crowd control. As well as make sure no hanky-panky happens at nite.
I was complimented on a job well done by the organiser, but being on a low-dose-of-compliment that month, I merely mumbled a thank you and walked away as I didnt know wat else to say. Mayb I fear the more I speak, the more likely they aint gonna hire me for the next stint.
I was never too sure what to do with compliments from constipated-looking adults; to gloat shamelessly and tickle a person into grinning goofily or to do the norm, smile and said thank u. (In Malaysia, for the chinese culture, the norm reaction after being complimented would be, "No la..where got.." while smiling apologetically and waving at some invisible flies..)
Anyway, I remembered a scene where the teens had to act out a senario where a gal got pregnant and what's the consequences that comes from it.
So my team got a guy to act out the gal's part and prepared him a wig and fake tummy outta newspaper. Then they got tis really tall geeky kid whom in my opinion as rather quiet by nature but really talkative when talked to (either that, he's got a crush on me).
So there we were, acting the scene out (with me standing beside em cause we didnt had much practice and I was supposedly the director), as the tall kid (who was supposedly to be the father of the unborn child) tried to stop the "mum" from aborting the child by hanging on at first to "her" shirt then "her" (muscular) arms then "her" (unseen but muscular) leg, I was there pushing the "father" to see how far he can go.
The ppl surrounding us thought we looked alike the wrestling scene where I was the ref counting as the "father" tried to arm-wrestle "mum's" foot into submission.
It was a weird scene cos there was the geeky "father" and the teacher-looking-ref pounding on the wooden floor shouting "More! More!" and a weird looking "mum" with misshapen boobs and tummy trying to make a getaway (while hanging on to "her" misshapen assets and wig).
When it ended, we bowed and made our due. Everybody grinned goofily and having spontaneus fun.
It was nice seeing bunch of simple kids making their debut at being desperate thespians once a while, even if the audience were just a bunch of adults suffering from hemorroids.
posted by M.E. # 11:54 AM 0 Comments
Anyway, it was a period of peace where I was being a third party; merely being an invisible pusher where it needs pushing and do nothing more than being a guide or crowd control. As well as make sure no hanky-panky happens at nite.
I was complimented on a job well done by the organiser, but being on a low-dose-of-compliment that month, I merely mumbled a thank you and walked away as I didnt know wat else to say. Mayb I fear the more I speak, the more likely they aint gonna hire me for the next stint.
I was never too sure what to do with compliments from constipated-looking adults; to gloat shamelessly and tickle a person into grinning goofily or to do the norm, smile and said thank u. (In Malaysia, for the chinese culture, the norm reaction after being complimented would be, "No la..where got.." while smiling apologetically and waving at some invisible flies..)
Anyway, I remembered a scene where the teens had to act out a senario where a gal got pregnant and what's the consequences that comes from it.
So my team got a guy to act out the gal's part and prepared him a wig and fake tummy outta newspaper. Then they got tis really tall geeky kid whom in my opinion as rather quiet by nature but really talkative when talked to (either that, he's got a crush on me).
So there we were, acting the scene out (with me standing beside em cause we didnt had much practice and I was supposedly the director), as the tall kid (who was supposedly to be the father of the unborn child) tried to stop the "mum" from aborting the child by hanging on at first to "her" shirt then "her" (muscular) arms then "her" (unseen but muscular) leg, I was there pushing the "father" to see how far he can go.
The ppl surrounding us thought we looked alike the wrestling scene where I was the ref counting as the "father" tried to arm-wrestle "mum's" foot into submission.
It was a weird scene cos there was the geeky "father" and the teacher-looking-ref pounding on the wooden floor shouting "More! More!" and a weird looking "mum" with misshapen boobs and tummy trying to make a getaway (while hanging on to "her" misshapen assets and wig).
When it ended, we bowed and made our due. Everybody grinned goofily and having spontaneus fun.
It was nice seeing bunch of simple kids making their debut at being desperate thespians once a while, even if the audience were just a bunch of adults suffering from hemorroids.
posted by M.E. # 11:54 AM 0 Comments
Compliments..Oh, Compliments
I love being complimented.
"Angela, u r getting more beautiful.."
"Wah, u r getting sexier eh.."
"U look nice. U should wear that more often.."
"Wow.."
"U did something?"
It always warm my heart knowing that ppl appreaciate some paragon of beauty like me..(some would disagree and said I'm a paragon of violence, but that's another different story)
I love complimenting myself sometimes too..
"Oh Angela, ur gap between ur toes are getting smaller, u r behaving like a lady now, not a duck walking with paddles for feet.."
"Wow Angela, ur hair is getting less messy now, those frequent baths do wonders.."
"Ppl rarely mistaken ur constant holding ur fart in as constipation anymore, sometimes, they can barely tell!"
But then, beautiful ppl would never write entry like this. :|
"Our ego is like our feet, they need constant massaging." - Ngy, applies for other part of the body too
"Angela, u r getting more beautiful.."
"Wah, u r getting sexier eh.."
"U look nice. U should wear that more often.."
"Wow.."
"U did something?"
It always warm my heart knowing that ppl appreaciate some paragon of beauty like me..(some would disagree and said I'm a paragon of violence, but that's another different story)
I love complimenting myself sometimes too..
"Oh Angela, ur gap between ur toes are getting smaller, u r behaving like a lady now, not a duck walking with paddles for feet.."
"Wow Angela, ur hair is getting less messy now, those frequent baths do wonders.."
"Ppl rarely mistaken ur constant holding ur fart in as constipation anymore, sometimes, they can barely tell!"
But then, beautiful ppl would never write entry like this. :|
Labels: Crap
posted by M.E. # 11:54 AM 2 Comments
Paying For It
Yes, the topic has crossed my mind cos a friend mentioned it to me.
It's an age old question for the dating parties as to defining the line between generousity and being a s*cker.
For me personally, I prefer dutch style. That's y all my dates ended up my friends whom in the long distance of friendship, slowly expects or even ask me jokingly to pay for both of our meals. Jokingly I decline, unjokingly, I never call em after tat.
For a gal to pay for a meal or a gift applicable only for during special occassion or when she feels generous or having a good enough excuse to spend a little bit more than she can afford. But all must come from her decision, not from some dude who thinks it's farney to ask a gal to pay. It's so wrong.
Long ago, somebody told me tat, in the olden time, men feel privileged to pay for a meal cos it means a chance for another meal or date.
Nowadays, a guy has been thru too many dating processes (read: feel cheated) and feel tired to keep on forking out cash. Sometimes, I feel sorry for em s*ckers, but on another hand, mayb they deserve it.
I mean, why pay to show their generousity when they cant afford it? Tried cooking at home? It's cheaper and ensures petting session after that (pls pls pls make sure housemate is bribed to take a hike somewhere), if the guy plays his card right.
So some gals actually are pretty understanding and pay for some of the meale; she picked up tis tab so he can pick up the next. But if he forgets once, twice..it's endless unanswerable ringtones for the guy in the future or the common excuse; bz.
I kinda pity the guys for paying everytime, but then I looked back on the guys I've dated..that's the only initiative they've taken in a long loooong time. (I was hoping for a romp in the car but so far, no luck. Eastern men I've dated are so dimwitted..)
Summary : Guys should pay, until after in a steady relationship, both can pay alternately though guys still pay during special occassion. That way, nobody feel used, I hope.
PS : All I want is a guy (not boy) of my own whom I can use till he cried "No more.." *sigh..
posted by M.E. # 10:05 AM 0 Comments
It's an age old question for the dating parties as to defining the line between generousity and being a s*cker.
For me personally, I prefer dutch style. That's y all my dates ended up my friends whom in the long distance of friendship, slowly expects or even ask me jokingly to pay for both of our meals. Jokingly I decline, unjokingly, I never call em after tat.
For a gal to pay for a meal or a gift applicable only for during special occassion or when she feels generous or having a good enough excuse to spend a little bit more than she can afford. But all must come from her decision, not from some dude who thinks it's farney to ask a gal to pay. It's so wrong.
Long ago, somebody told me tat, in the olden time, men feel privileged to pay for a meal cos it means a chance for another meal or date.
Nowadays, a guy has been thru too many dating processes (read: feel cheated) and feel tired to keep on forking out cash. Sometimes, I feel sorry for em s*ckers, but on another hand, mayb they deserve it.
I mean, why pay to show their generousity when they cant afford it? Tried cooking at home? It's cheaper and ensures petting session after that (pls pls pls make sure housemate is bribed to take a hike somewhere), if the guy plays his card right.
So some gals actually are pretty understanding and pay for some of the meale; she picked up tis tab so he can pick up the next. But if he forgets once, twice..it's endless unanswerable ringtones for the guy in the future or the common excuse; bz.
I kinda pity the guys for paying everytime, but then I looked back on the guys I've dated..that's the only initiative they've taken in a long loooong time. (I was hoping for a romp in the car but so far, no luck. Eastern men I've dated are so dimwitted..)
Summary : Guys should pay, until after in a steady relationship, both can pay alternately though guys still pay during special occassion. That way, nobody feel used, I hope.
PS : All I want is a guy (not boy) of my own whom I can use till he cried "No more.." *sigh..
posted by M.E. # 10:05 AM 0 Comments
Pirates Ahoy!
Just went thru another program last saturday.
I woke at 5.30..took my bath and hoping to depart at 6 am.
As I drove me car out the parking lot, behold. Lo, a "pancit" tyre.
It was; my belated Friday the 13th for the year, a Malcom-In-The-Middle moment (read: worse case senarios).
So rushing for time, I was hoping to catch a taxi to my destination; One Utama.
It was saturday dawn; a taxi wouldnt fetch me while another tried to con me ("How much to 1u?" I said. "RM40" he said. "Bye" I said.)
So used lrt from Taman Melati to Taman Bahagia..which overall took 30 min..still alrite. Then took the taxi frm there and went to One World Hotel. Thankfully met a late fellow volunteer.
Let me tell u this; One World Hotel is just operational for 2 months, and the ballrooms' massive chandelier were so impressive tat I almost peed and able to accomodate up to 2200 ppl at a time (combine all 3 ballrooms). Too bad I didnt bring my cam.
So after a fast briefing, we went off to our post. The theme for the day was Pirates. So some of the volunteers were dressed up as so-call-pirates (their costumes alike ancient captains of the ships or pompous hey-men of the day rather than looters) and carousing the mall with a pirate flag each while smiling at passing lookers instead of grimacing or drooling at one side of the mouth.
I was the bodyguard for the precious clues which the participants were supposed to get before could proceed to the next step, but we were cheeky to ask em to do something first, like "Kidnap any kid from the area surrounding us" which was replied by a concern parent-participant with a pained look of "Really?" and also "Loot something from the surrounding shops.." which excited way too many participants but which we stopped them by "Whoa..Hang on. Just kidding" before handling em the clues.
Met some really cute ppl on the road, only to discover em all..born years behind me. *sigh..
When it comes to my age, the cute ones are either taken or eligible as a stand in for ur younger brother. *sigh..So it's a look-only-hands-free kinda thing with celibate in thoughts.
Anyway, the program ended with aplomb, and we (the volunteers) went shopping!
I for one, never really liked shopping in groups that much cos I dun like waiting for ppl to browse stuff that I dun like, in another word, I have weird taste. So getting bored, I digress every once a while and get stuff for meself.
By the time we finished, a friend volunteered to fetch me home. Finally, Lady Fortune smiled upon me.
So he fetched me back, and I chia-ed him dinner, and brought him to see the house and he went back.
What? Were you expecting some hanky-panky, petting session and dirty details here?
Hehe..dream on.
I woke at 5.30..took my bath and hoping to depart at 6 am.
As I drove me car out the parking lot, behold. Lo, a "pancit" tyre.
It was; my belated Friday the 13th for the year, a Malcom-In-The-Middle moment (read: worse case senarios).
So rushing for time, I was hoping to catch a taxi to my destination; One Utama.
It was saturday dawn; a taxi wouldnt fetch me while another tried to con me ("How much to 1u?" I said. "RM40" he said. "Bye" I said.)
So used lrt from Taman Melati to Taman Bahagia..which overall took 30 min..still alrite. Then took the taxi frm there and went to One World Hotel. Thankfully met a late fellow volunteer.
Let me tell u this; One World Hotel is just operational for 2 months, and the ballrooms' massive chandelier were so impressive tat I almost peed and able to accomodate up to 2200 ppl at a time (combine all 3 ballrooms). Too bad I didnt bring my cam.
So after a fast briefing, we went off to our post. The theme for the day was Pirates. So some of the volunteers were dressed up as so-call-pirates (their costumes alike ancient captains of the ships or pompous hey-men of the day rather than looters) and carousing the mall with a pirate flag each while smiling at passing lookers instead of grimacing or drooling at one side of the mouth.
I was the bodyguard for the precious clues which the participants were supposed to get before could proceed to the next step, but we were cheeky to ask em to do something first, like "Kidnap any kid from the area surrounding us" which was replied by a concern parent-participant with a pained look of "Really?" and also "Loot something from the surrounding shops.." which excited way too many participants but which we stopped them by "Whoa..Hang on. Just kidding" before handling em the clues.
Met some really cute ppl on the road, only to discover em all..born years behind me. *sigh..
When it comes to my age, the cute ones are either taken or eligible as a stand in for ur younger brother. *sigh..So it's a look-only-hands-free kinda thing with celibate in thoughts.
Anyway, the program ended with aplomb, and we (the volunteers) went shopping!
I for one, never really liked shopping in groups that much cos I dun like waiting for ppl to browse stuff that I dun like, in another word, I have weird taste. So getting bored, I digress every once a while and get stuff for meself.
By the time we finished, a friend volunteered to fetch me home. Finally, Lady Fortune smiled upon me.
So he fetched me back, and I chia-ed him dinner, and brought him to see the house and he went back.
What? Were you expecting some hanky-panky, petting session and dirty details here?
Hehe..dream on.
Labels: Daily
posted by M.E. # 9:36 AM 0 Comments
Restless, Dio Mio
Been to toilet 3 times tis morn.
I'm so restless, my legs' almost broke into half with my fidgeting.
And I cant stop thinking..thinking of someone I shouldnt think.
Think..Dont think..Think..Dont think..
And when I think too much, I grimace a lot.
When I grimace a lot, I get wrinkles.
When I get wrinkles, I get irritated.
When I get irritated, I wanna bite somebody's head off. Or ram it into some wall, or toilet bowl. Or mash it up into a pulp.
And the head I'm aiming at, it's his.
And I cant do that cos, I'll get sued.
I'm so screwed.
I'm so restless, my legs' almost broke into half with my fidgeting.
And I cant stop thinking..thinking of someone I shouldnt think.
Think..Dont think..Think..Dont think..
And when I think too much, I grimace a lot.
When I grimace a lot, I get wrinkles.
When I get wrinkles, I get irritated.
When I get irritated, I wanna bite somebody's head off. Or ram it into some wall, or toilet bowl. Or mash it up into a pulp.
And the head I'm aiming at, it's his.
And I cant do that cos, I'll get sued.
I'm so screwed.
Labels: Crap
posted by M.E. # 12:27 PM 0 Comments
ParaNoia
She was fidgeting again.
He sure was in a good mood.
She couldnt stop biting her nails as she continued clicking on the keyboard, typing nothing.
He was walking with a spring in his steps.
She couldnt stop glancing at the door to his office.
All she could think about is..I'm screwed. And grimaced.
Then he walked out and stopped by her cubicle, "Great job! We are on the right track!" And a big grin.
She smiled reluctantly and thought..He's out to get me.
"The truth is usually just an excuse for a lack of imagination." - Garak, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
He sure was in a good mood.
She couldnt stop biting her nails as she continued clicking on the keyboard, typing nothing.
He was walking with a spring in his steps.
She couldnt stop glancing at the door to his office.
All she could think about is..I'm screwed. And grimaced.
Then he walked out and stopped by her cubicle, "Great job! We are on the right track!" And a big grin.
She smiled reluctantly and thought..He's out to get me.
Labels: Story
posted by M.E. # 10:16 AM 0 Comments
Making Sense Outta Nonsense
Act, and you shall have dinner; wait, and you shall be dinner.
-Gowron, Klingon proverb, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Homer: Kids, there's three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.
Bart: Isn't that the wrong way?
Homer: Yeah, but faster!
-The Simpsons, "Homer to the Max"
Peter: Can’t we tell them that your mother died?
Lois: Peter, I’m not gonna lie about something like that.
Peter: All right, all right, I’ll kill your mother.
-Family Guy, “A Very Special Family Guy Freakin’ Christmas”
Labels: Quotes
posted by M.E. # 10:08 AM 0 Comments
Things I've Read That Makes Me Feel Happy For A Second Or Two..
Bandits will attack Queen Elizabeth. To save her life she will have to call on the knights sworn to defend her—Elton John, Mick Jagger, and Paul McCartney.
People will automatically smile for pictures when photographers develop a flash that emits not only a sudden burst of light, but also the sound of Barbra Streisand being mauled by a bear.
Peter's voice on tape: Please leave the lights off, Lois. I dont want to be seen.
Lois: I imagined you wouldn't after the way you acted a while ago.
Peter's voice on tape: I thought you might say something like that.
Lois: Anyway, I've convinced Meg to go to the dance.
Peter's voice on tape: Please don't yell, Lois. I've learned my lesson!
Lois: But I wasn't—
Peter's voice on tape: Oh, you would happen to bring that up, Lois. Can't you leave the past where it belongs?
Lois: Peter what's gotten into you—
Peter's voice on tape: Because I've already said it was a scavenger hunt.
Lois: [pulls over bed sheets and sees pillows and tape player] What the...?
Peter's voice on tape: Lois, if you still haven't discovered I'm gone, please flip the tape over to side B.
-Family Guy, "Let's Go To the Hop"
Spock: This is the new brig, Captain. It is escape-proof.
Kirk: How do you know?
Spock: The designers tested it using the most intelligent and resourceful person they could find. He failed to escape.
Kirk: This person didn't by any chance have pointed ears and an unerring capacity for getting his shipmates into trouble, did he?
Spock: He did have pointed ears.
-Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
Ancient scrolls will reveal that Noah originally planned on bringing three of each species on his ark, not to save them from the flood but just to see if any of the animals were into that kind of thing.
Mr. T has a son that he names after himself. To avoid confusion the boy is known as Mr. Lowercase T.
Labels: Quotes
posted by M.E. # 10:06 AM 0 Comments
My Funny Sis and I
Nat was telling me story of her presentation.
My sis is currently studying nursing at Singapore. Finishing in 2 yrs time.
She was telling me how one of the sketch was where she played the nurse role, attending to a patient.
So there's tis part where the patient's supposedly to cry, and she's supposedly to offer the patient a hanky.
When it reached that part, her friend was looking at her, and she was looking at him with the hanky ready, waiting for her cue.
1 second, 2 second..10 seconds. Still no tear. Silence.
Last, she said, "U need a tissue?"
The crowd erupted in laughter, the patient finally cried mockly..and they bowed.
Somehow, I think she should've punched the guy pretending to be the patient, and said, "Cry, u p*ssy".
Will the crowd erupt, or will the sound of crickets magnify?
Labels: Daily
posted by M.E. # 9:45 AM 0 Comments
Infectious Attitude
I used to join this team building program when I was like a snotting freshie out for her first job with lotsa idealistic ideas on how to change the world ( and her current financial status ) for the better.
The internship taught me alot..made me do many things I dun wanna do but at the end of the day, it pays off. And I get to meet lotsa incredible ppl along the way.
I was an idealistic fool, alike Don Juan on his journey to slay some imaginary dragons and rescuing damsels in distress..I couldnt help thinking that I could be for once, a star of my life journal. (Yes, I hav a pathetic self-esteem then..now my ego is off the chart on good days..crap on bad days)
It was the period too that the team building company was recruiting volunteers to help them out on their programs. (Yes, me, doing team building stuff..ironic)
So, there I was, methaphorically jumping up and down with my imaginary cheerleader uniform going, "Yes! U can do it! Smile..and the world smile with u.." with a cheesy grin to match, bringing (hopefully) positive attitudes to ppl who frown for a living.
Yes, I was a cheerleader..aka free-labour-who's-self-initiated-and-who-makes-believe-that-she-can-persuade-other-ppl-to-hav-fun.
After almost four years with them, doing on and off programs..I just discovered I'm just like every manic drivers out there who drive like the road belongs to them and everybody else is dispensable (meaning hypocrite) and curses with the window shields down (and double checked to make sure no sound from inside escaped to the murder-potential-unforgivable-ears out there).
I can assure u, I am no saint, deviant in thoughts and many times, violent (my friends' bruises can attest to that).
So sometimes for somebody to believe that for a small opening window in time, that I too, can be normal..makes me wanna achieve the impossible.
So, this weekend, I will go, with my imaginary pom-pom..and screaming my heart out at all the strangers out there, and for once more..believing that, I am just like everybody else.
Wait..tat doesnt sound right..I wanna stand out..not conform..fine..I will not wear undies when I do my cheering. Now, at least that's doing something different from the rest..*chuckle-chuckle.
Note to self : Shear bush.
Labels: Daily, Self-Dissect
posted by M.E. # 9:05 AM 2 Comments
Another Pieces of Me
I always wanted to kiss him silly..
With his little button nose..
And little pouty lips..
Then I woke up..
And saw saliva on the pillow..
And he was sprawled on the floor..
Next thing I know..
They draw borders around his body..
Using white silky chalk..
Carried him away..
On cold hard stone..
With birds chirping on a really nice day..
Now I will always miss his little button nose..
And little pouty lips..
And dream a little dream.
Every morning me and my sis has a ritual.
We'd drive down the road from our condo to the lrt, looking for target to practice our morning mood.
I'd go, "Please dun drive like tat, uncle, see how you'd feel if I ram u down with my kenari."
And my sis would go, "YEA, STUPID!" at the top of her lung at some unfortunate stranger..with the window scrolled up.
It was 6.45 am in the morning..too early for morning coffee and too late for cursing.
Labels: Daily
posted by M.E. # 9:03 AM 0 Comments
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